In the build-up to Conference Season, Media Monitor laments the passing of the conference jester - from August 2003 Geoscientist
We all know about Stegosaurus. It's big, chunky and let's face it, a bit of an embarrassment - the John Prescott of the dinosaur world. True, the BBC's Walking with dinosaurs tried its valiant best to recast this armoured personnel carrier of a dinosaur as an exciting character. But imagine their surprise when the Society of Vertebrate Palaeontology in Norman, Oklahoma, received a paper posted by "TR Karbek" (claiming to be of the Steveville Academy of Paleontological Studies, Patricia, Alberta) who was offering to put the case for "Stegoaurus as an agile cursorial biped".
For the benefit of those whose palaeontology (or Latin) is a bit rusty, "cursorial" means "adapted to running". And even after the most recent phases of the seemingly perpetual re-evaluation of the Dinosauria, as far as palaeontology is concerned, Stegosaurus's image has stubbornly remained about as cursorial as a corporation dustcart.
New Scientist was rather more suspicious of this abstract than the seemingly uncritial compilers of the conference abstracts volume, and asked whether or not someone might be playing a trick - to see if the conference organisers were actually reading what they were receiving.
Now, as reported in the magazine's Feedback column, the poster submitted for this presentation hardly helped to convince them. Their reporter saw a couple of photocopied illustrations, tilted to suggest a Stegosaurus on two legs. So did other journalists, because this abstract's remarkable claim generated quite a few media inquiries that the conference organisers needed to push in the direction of the alleged author. Only at this point did said organisers discover the truth - that TR Karbek did not exist and the whole paper, with abstract, was a hoax.
This story struck a chord with MM. For, hard to believe though it may be today, this genial boulevardier of Piccadilly was once a cock-snooking smartass research student himself, and is now ready confess that he once performed a similar stunt. Ever the editor, he received an invitation to a conference at a university in an East Anglian market town on the River Cam that ended with the line "I will/not be presenting a paper entitled………………..". This was irresistible. Over the two dotted lines provided, he wrote: "Granulite metamorphism in NW Scotland".
It read quite correctly, for MM had not the least intention of presenting such a paper. For one thing, MM knew absolutely zip about any kind of metamorphism anywhere, let alone the granulite variety in the NW Highlands. For another, the conference was supposed to be about the carbonate sedimentology of reefs. MM posted it off with a chuckle, and thought no more if it.
Imagine his surprise when, some months later, a letter arrived asking politely for abstract. Better and better. An abstract on granulite metamorphism in NW Sotland was duly concocted and submitted, complete with bogus references to papers by Mouse, M, Duck, D. and all their co-workers at the Disney Institute.